Women habitually come into the dating or marriage
scene with “great” expectations of what our future man is going to be like or
how he will be characteristically as a husband…You see what you want
to see instead of seeing what you need
to see.As a result, when that man doesn’t meet those awfully high expectations that were set, we are ultimately disappointed and realistically downright turned off. We begin to speak disrespectfully to him, turn our nose up at every little thing he does or says, and sadly become silent altogether before long.
You just became the victim of your own misplaced
expectations.
Now what’s going to happen is your man or husband
will have to pay for you not being fulfilled the way you wanted to be. He’s
going to be the scapegoat for you not feeling whole or desired. The reality is,
though, it’s not his fault your desires for this perfect man were, let’s see—illogical.
A man is only going to be just that—a man.
He’s not going to be this perfect prince who will sweep you off your feet every day or take you on romantic rendezvous at random like they do on Lifetime or in the movies. Matter of fact, he’s not going to be all “lovey dovey” every day. That’s reality.
He’s going to be imperfect; just like you are.
It is absolutely great to have expectations for who you want to date or marry. We all want to be with someone who is morally sound and financially stable. However, it is unquestionably wrong to put highly irrational expectations on any person just so you can feel better about yourself. It’s not his responsibility to constantly fulfill your desires. He will not be everything to you every day.
The only expectations any woman should have for their man is fidelity, unconditional love, compassion, support, and protection. Anything else is optional and you might just search your whole life trying to find that "Mr. Right." As long as he is loyal, honest, loving, and keeps you secure in your home together, he’s doing his job. Anything else you’re seeking, you shouldn’t be looking at him; you should be looking to God to provide that. After all, He should be number one in your life anyway.
So I ask you, in dating or in a marriage, what are some expectations that you think are too irrational or highly misplaced? Do you feel we as women sometimes set the bar too high where no man but God can hurdle over?
How many women do you know that "see what they want to see instead of what they need see". A thousand, more who see only material things; love based on sex alone; looks alone, etc. We could be here all day with this list. Can this be attributed to the divorce rate problem. We have to dig deeper and think about the future, right? Not today, marry now and think afterwards. The ultimate goal today is not being alone. Theirs this fear about it, so we begin to settle for less.
ReplyDeleteGirl we have to educate them on the front end, but even then that woman has to see it for herself and make that decision. I know they say "if you like it, I love it"; but I'm sticking with my ending: "If you like it, I still don't."